a shout out to grandma

For the last 6.5 years of my life I have been pastoring in Independence and have met a whole bunch of people during that time.  Sometimes as I'm heading into QuikTrip or somewhere else around town, I will bump into someone whom I haven't seen in months or even years.  The other night I had one of those encounters.  As I was driving down 24 highway at 9pm on a Sunday night in Independence, I saw someone walking down the road who looked a lot like a student that I had met several years back at the church.  I quickly pulled over to the side of the road and saw that it was the guy who I thought it was.  I asked the young man where he was headed and if he needed a ride.  He told me he was heading home and that a ride would be nice.  During our 10 minute drive and interaction, I learned that Bret was living with his grandma because his mom was in jail and his dad kicked him out of the house a few years back.  He told me that his grandma was a cafeteria worker at a Jr. high school and she was helping him get back on his feet.

After dropping Bret off, I pulled back out of his driveway to make my way back home and I started thinking, 'what would this community do without grandmas and grandpas who were there to intervene in their children and grandchildren's lives?'  I know that may sound like a random and/or trivial thought, but in the last 6.5 years I have heard countless stories just like Bret's: parents who have given up on their children, parents who have disappeared, parents who have kicked their children out of the house, parents in jail, parents who are addicts, etc.  In fact, in the last month alone, I have heard 3-4 scenarios similar to this one.

While I was blessed to have parents who were present and invested in my life, I am realizing that my experience is slowly becoming a rarity and a minority in many communities.  If you have or have had parents who were present in your lives, please be thankful for them.

So as I write this, I want to give a shout out to grandparents who have:
-taken your own children back into the house as adults because of hardships they have fallen upon.
-taken in your grandchildren because their parents are either not present in their lives or because parents have given up on their children.
-sacrificed your own fiances, homes, vehicles, and resources to support your grandchildren when their parents have not done so.
-taken on the role of parents in their grandchildren's lives.
-chosen to keep working in order to financially support the children and grandchildren who have entered your home.
-Put up with loud music you would never listen to or watched tv shows you would never watch because you now have a 16 year old living in your house again.
-Stayed up late or set a key outside to make sure your grandchild gets in safely at night.
-And other examples like these...

I think the main reason I was compelled to write this is because I see something very Christlike in the behaviors I listed above.  I am one who believes that Christ never gives up on any of his children and has a heart especially for those who have been dealt a less than favorable hand.  Great job grandma and grandpa for welcoming, loving, and caring as Christ has called you to do.

observations from an 11th grader

I had the opportunity to sit down with one of my high school students just the other day (over some Pizza Hut!).  It was not hard to see that something was on his mind.  He had just gotten back from a seven day Caribbean cruise to Jamaica, Cozumel, and Cosa' Maya.  Without much prodding, he began to throw out some questions that had swimming around in his mind.  As we grow and progress as followers of our Lord Jesus Christ, we are called to look at the world around us- our communities, our patterns, the way we live, etc, and hold them up alongside the words, teachings, and life of Christ.  I was ministered to by my younger brother in Chris the other day.

On his trip to Jamaica


"Jay, when we got to Jamaica, I was immediately shocked at the standard of living compared to that of Americans... I learned that lots of people in Jamaica will share homes with one another.  It is very common for grandparents and their children to live under the same roof and for people in a neighborhood to share everything.  Many people who were on the cruise were saying how they felt bad for the people but I noticed something special about them: everyone seemed like they were family with everyone else.  It is not that way back in America.  We all have our own separate houses, our own separate lawn mowers, our own separate cars... It is like be build our homes to keep other people out of them... There seemed to be something that was special about the way they lived."


On his family


"I'm beginning to wonder if I really believe in love.  My mom and dad were married for 30 years and got divorced.  What if the emotions I have for my wife begin to fall away after 20+ years or so?... Or, what if her love for me begins to do this same thing?  How can a marriage survive if it is only based on the emotions we feel and don't feel?"

The unexamined life


"I get frustrated with other people my age.  They don't question or seem to care about anything.  Everyone my age seems to just go through life believing and excepting everything that they are taught.  Doesn't anyone care about the deeper issues and meaning of life?  Are we here just to make money?  To someday have a big house? Isn't there more?  If there is more, why does it seem like everyone is o.k. with not pursuing more?"

-----

Isn't it funny how God  can teach us through people and in ways we least expect it?  Thank you brother for sharing your heart and your desire to strive after Christ in your life.