Wednesday, June 29, 2011

leaving a church

The idea of leaving a church family has always been an interesting one to me.  While I want to avoid making broad/sweeping statements, I believe that, in many circumstances, a lot of people leave churches due to a consumeristic and individualistic Christian faith.  Church exists to serve me... and if I feel as though I am not being served adequately, I will find another place that will.  In fact, this trend is not too shocking, especially when we look at the number of broken families and marriages in our country.  For so many people, divorce and separation is a convenient and easily accessible answer when a spouse is not meeting our needs.  Our country affirms the creed, "you can't enforce your believes and values on me.  I've got to do me.  I have to take care of me and my needs."

So why should anyone be surprised when people leave one church to find another church that, "better fits our needs?"  

Along similar lines, sometimes people who have attended a church for years will simply stop showing up and go somewhere else without any explanation.  Again, this is where the consumer says, "I don't owe you an explanation... I don't have to run my plans by you."  But if we truly believe that we are the Body of Christ and are family, wouldn't we want to be in conversation with our family if we were considering a departure as opposed to just disappearing?  

As I read through Acts today, I came across a passage where Paul and Barnabas found themselves in stark disagreement over a practical issue and decided to part company.  While this comparison does not perfectly fit this conversation, it has caused me to ask the question, "When is it appropriate and good to part company with a church family?  And if so, what is the proper way to do it?"
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1 comment:

  1. Happy Elf Mom (Christine)December 22, 2011 at 9:28 AM

    Hello! I've just been browsing your blog today and thought I would leave a friendly comment.

    Honestly? People didn't used to leave churches because if they did, they could lose their jobs or their social standing. (Even today, you can see politicians use their church standing to help score votes and KEEP THEIR JOBS.)

    It isn't so much the "consumer mentality" as you put it that we do things as we do today; it is precisely BECAUSE of the "consumer mentality" that people often stayed with churches they secretly thought were awful in the old days.

    I thought it was interesting that the post following this one was about the "big" church in town (you know, the pleasant one). Honestly, though, I think that there are many advantages to a larger church and that it is not necessarily less spiritual to attend the big church. It can be. But a larger church is simply going to be more efficient in many ways.

    Have you been to this church? It does emphasize small group time, although (again with the consumer mentality) many people choose NOT to go to these.

    The "church" simply has no more real authority over anyone's life than the busybody in checkout aisle three anymore. Actually, that should be incredibly freeing to pastors and the like because it means that the people who are there want to be there and want to learn and be a part of the church family.

    Ok. Thanks for listening and have a happy Christmas! :)

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